Well, no sooner do I say that Newcastle are Man United's bitch, Keggers goes and instills some steely backbone into his Toon lads and they pull off a rather surprising draw at Old Trafford. Apparently it's been some 36 years since Newcastle last beat Man United at Old Trafford, so we're happy with a draw this morning. But, don't forget that United only got 2 points from their first 3 games last season, so...

Chelsea look strong and impressive, and playing to a Brazilian samba rythm, apparently. I managed to catch a few minutes of their game against Portsmouth and they looked crisp and tasty. Just like a packet of Walkers Cheese and Onion.

Aye, another scorcher this morning. I'm in my leopard skin thong and sweating like a pig, and it's still only 8.20 in the morning...at least the jellyfish have disappeared, looks like they've shimmied themselves all the way over to the UK coast...

It looks like a certain Mr Berbatov could finally be on his way to Man United in the next few hours. And, as I utter this through gritted teeth, this move is likely to make Man United just that little bit stronger. Berbatov is a classy player, let's face it, way too classy for a club like Spurs. And he could be enough to help Man United steal the show yet again this year.

Don't get me wrong, as a Gooner I'm usually optimistic, and the lads will be there fighting for it, of that I'm sure, but Man United's strength in-depth is what makes the difference. They didn't need to go out and splash the cash. None of their regular first-team squad left (despite constant press-mongering from those fuckers over at Madrid), so they will be strong yet again this year. Ditto for Chelsea, who have actually strengthened without losing stars too. But no, I'm not going to launch into a tirade about why Arsene should go and open those purse strings. We all know he should, let's leave it at that. Let's just hope that if Berbatov does actually join Man United, then it will spark off a tumultuous Premiership summer spending spree that will see Arsenal get a couple of decent, experienced players (and perhaps see a taker for Eboue? Please...). Please Arsene, no more 17 year old starlets.

Anyway, tonight it really kicks off for Arsenal. Could be a little bit tougher than we are probably anticipating, and without a few regulars, including Toure, Cesc and Senderos. Perhaps a little something to come from some of the youngsters? Jack is there, Aaron and Carlos too. Looking forward to it, though not sure if I'll be able to catch the game live.

Aahhh, footie, it's back!

Oh crikey, is it that time of year already? And there I was, soaking up some rays, sipping my lager while carefully studying the eye candy strolling past...and then I realised that not everybody is fortunate enough to live next to the Med, some people have to work for a living. Like those poorly paid Premiership players, for example. Bless 'em, let's not get them jealous with tales of sun-soaked fun.

Anyway, as the Med gently laps at my toes, yesterday saw the annual Charity Shield bash, this year it was Man United v Portsmouth. Now I know why the start of the season almost passed me by...hardly the most appetising game possible, right? So, who won? Does anyone really care, apart from a few Man United fans who will go on and on and on (mentioning no names here) about this being another trophy-laden season...the bastards. And talking of bastards, this little story of a possible Henry return to UK shores is a little hard to take. My beer suddenly doesn't taste quite as good...

With an important Champs League qualifier in mid-week, Arsenal are looking reasonable, even if it means we have to take the badge kissing antics of a certain Adebayor. He's still top-class, even if he still misses sitters. And who else out there is available, within Arsene's price range? Exactly.

This weekend also saw the start of the lower leagues (all those not privileged with celebrity Premiership status), including my homeboys, Eastbourne Borough, who are bidding for entry into the League - this season they are in the Conference (now the Blue Square Premier) for the first time in their history. Unfortunately, even with the ancestors sent to bang the drums and spit at the ref, they blew it and lost 1-0 at home to Rushden and Diamonds.

Time for another beer. More tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow, this blog is back in business!

Third time in four years...

OK, so yesterday's Cup Final wasn't the classic that we were all hoping for, but the game did have its moments. Rooney was hot the entire game and I was sure he was going to hit a beauty into the roof of Lehmann's net every time he got the ball, the stocky little bastard. Thank Christ Jens put in a great performance, he was the only Arsenal player who really shone. Manure totally outplayed us, as can be seen from the game stats, but it ain't never over until it's over...

The first final to ever to go to penalties, so the record-breakers that are Arsenal continue setting records, of sorts...it's a cruel way to end a game, but probably better than starting all over again in a replay. Scholes is probably feeling a little sore after having his penalty saved, but who cares??

Best moments of all:

Ljunberg's reflex header off the line, unbelievable...

AND seeing Fergie wince the moment he knew we'd won the Cup. Time to retire mate...

6 days and counting...

The new BBQ grill has been set up, while the BBQ corner itself is a 'work in progress' but is almost there. The new turf is on its way on Tuesday morning, we'll probably have to turn on the sprinklers in time for the big match on Saturday. Beers have been purchased, a whole crate's worth. I can already feel the tension building up, but am feeling mighty confident, especially with the mess that has enveloped Manure the last few days...

I've already picked my Cup Final team, Arsene, so please take note:
Lehmann, Lauren, Senderos, Toure, Cole, Pires, Vieira, Edu, Fabregas, Henry, Van Persie.
Subs: Campbell, Ljunberg, Bergkamp, Reyes, Taylor.

In a real Friday the 13th match-up, Sir Alex looks like he's going to have to go head-to-head with young Malcolm if he wants to stay in charge. I'm laughing my ass off at this news. I reckon another 2 years and we'll see Manure in the Championship alongside Leeds...

...for Liverpool, who are no longer the 'best' team in Liverpool.

...for Manure/Sir Alex. Arsenal have surely done enough to wrap up the second spot and condemn Manure to struggle through the Champions League qualifiers this summer. Time to put the old goat out to pasture, I say.

...for Wigan supporters. Nice to see newbies make it to the big-time, but they must surely be odds-on favourites to make the drop. Wigan v Arsenal as a league fixture probably seemed a little optimistic 3 or 4 years ago...

...for moi. My first visit to the corridor of hell in 18 days. Kicked off with a 2-hour trek into the office thanks to horrendous traffic. My only solace was feeling Mrs. LBLS's bulging stomach and the accompanying kicks and body-flips by junior. Future free-kick taker I believe.

Ahh, good to be back in the civilized world. There was a moment when I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever make it back, but it all came good in the end (yesterday), telephone, Internet, cable, all correct and present. The new place is alot noisier than I thought, but we'll sort the neighbours out with the upcoming Cup Final BBQ.

Arsenal have been further cementing that gap with Manure to clinch an automatic spot for next year's Champions League. Only 3 matches to go and 4 points in front. Should be a given, but a tricky game against Liverpool should raise the heart rate for a few more days. As for the 'Pool, you have to take yer hat off to their tactical nous in putting out the mighty Chelski. Not the prettiest stuff ever, but still nice to see a British side in the Champs League final. Chelski and Milan would have been the dream final, but those fantasy footie matchups hardly ever happen, do they?

Nope, I'm not going to give too much space to Fergie, but I came across this interesting fact yesterday: Fergie has 'previous' in Israel as a dirty, lunatic, red-nosed player. He broke the nose of their star, Mordechai Spiegler, in a Scotland game in Tel Aviv in 1967. Think that is reason enough for all Israelis to stop even thinking of supporting his side. Right, G?

So, a cracking final awaits on May 21, the final everybody would prefer to see, unless you have a voodoo doll in an Arsenal or Manure strip and regularly stick pins in it...

Anyway, the BBQ is getting polished as we speak. G, bring the tissues, you Manure cry-baby! Don't worry, you will be crying when the Arse have finished with your pathetic rabble...Should be a great game with loads of yellow cards, Fergie rants and raves on the touchline and a kicking for Ruud van Horsey...

Ashley still can't commit to next season, eh? Pack your bags mate. Even though this might be contract 'negotiations', this smells mighty nasty to me. If Gael Clichy was fit, it would have been interesting to see if Arsene stuck with Ashley for the Chelski game on Wednesday.

Saw Alex Manninger in action yesterday (well, for 5 minutes) for Sienna...brought back some nice memories of the '98 season, especially when he leapt cat-like to claim a cross. That's the first time I've actually seen him play since he left Arsenal. Still looks like a little kid though.

Oh no, that's a real shame. Profits down at Manure? Will that mean an influx of cut-price 'stars' this summer, rather than the next Rooney or Rio? I'm personally gutted, though have decided to do my bit...here's my list of bargains that Manure might just fancy:

• Eric Djemba Djemba
• Diego Forlan
• Fabien Barthez
• Juan Sebastian Veron (though he might just prove an expensive flop...)
• Liam Miller (what? they already have him, who would have known...)

So, at least 4 fresh faces this summer, what do you think?

And continuing on in the caring, sharing mood, I think I know what I want for Christmas...one of these will do nicely, Mrs. LBLS.